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Thursday, Dec. 27, 2001 - 9:35 p.m. - A Quandary
 My Dear Readers, I come to you today with a dilemma, a quandary, a predicament if you will. You see, I received two gifts from a family member that I really don’t care for and I don’t know how to handle it. I don’t wish to divulge the nature of the gifts nor the relationship of the individual who presented them to me in fear that they might find this webpage and be hurt by what I have to say here. You see, despite my being very open to sharing my journal with a select group of personal friends along with the rest of the world, no one in my entire family is aware that this journal exists. Or at least I don’t think they do. I’m in constant fear that someone will find it and be hurt by something I’ve said. In fact, I rarely express any frustration with family members or friends in these pages out of that same fear. I know if you know my full name you can search on my name and find this journal (because I was very stupid once and entered my full name on a page with my journal link). Fortunately my parents aren’t very proficient with the internet and I doubt Michael’s parents would think to look up my name, though a few other relatives might. If they do and if they have found this site and are by chance reading it, I hope that they understand that they do so at their own risk. This is my journal and I didn’t tell them about it for a reason. The reason they weren’t told about it was that I want to be able to be honest about things and not be concerned about hurting feelings. Do you see something wrong with the statement I just made?? In the previous paragraph I wrote about how I don’t express frustration with family members enough out of concern of hurting them, and then just now I said that if they find it and read it and are hurt, it’s their own fault. I’m a complete dichotomy. I’m also usually too nice for my own good. I’m getting better at not getting trampled on, but I’m still stuck as to how to handle the situation I’m dealing with right now. I guess I’m particularly sensitive to the situation since I’ve been hurt by family members being very bold and telling me right up front that they didn’t care for the gift I gave them. I certainly don’t want to upset anyone the way I was wounded. The gifts in debate are items to use in the decoration of our home. They were given from a personal collection with the intention that they would fit well into our home. Quite honestly I find one gift completely hideous and the other perhaps not quite so bad, but certainly not something I would want to use to embellish my home. I guess I’m a bit of a snob in that most of the items I decorate with or have collected are usually pretty high quality and these are not. (I’ve always been of the school that I’d rather wait and buy something of good quality than just buy something to own it. Of course, this isn’t always the case, but often so.) Besides the issue of the poor quality of the items, they just aren’t my style nor are they my husband’s. Unfortunately they aren’t particularly small either, so they can’t be placed in a corner somewhere. Besides, the part of the issue is, how do I let the person know to please not buy me anything else of that kind in the future in a tactful way?? This is why I am coming to you, my dear, intelligent readers. I need some suggestions on how to handle this before I write my thank you notes. Do I just not say anything and say “thank you” politely and then give these items to Goodwill or some other charity? Do I try selling them on eBay? Since one of the items was from the person’s personal collection I’m afraid they would ask where that item is displayed when they come over to the house, if I gave it to charity or to someone else what do I tell them?? Is it better to tell the truth about the items, and if so, how can I do it most tactfully? I sure could use your ideas on this one.
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